


The Reapers: One Night Only!

by Beth_Penrose, Better_Than_Waffles



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2019-09-07 17:34:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16858348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beth_Penrose/pseuds/Beth_Penrose, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Better_Than_Waffles/pseuds/Better_Than_Waffles
Summary: The Reapers are going out on Tour!





	1. Chapter 1

Tour Packing List:  
-Every black item in the closet  
-Leather vest  
-Those boots (You know the ones)  
-Red sparkle dress  
-Purple sparkle dress  
-Hoop earrings and matching necklace  
-Blue sparkle dress  
-Skinny jeans  
-3 pairs of shorts  
-sweats and t-shirts (for sleeping)

“Lup, this is a great list, but aren’t we missing a few things?” Barry asked, handing the list back to his girlfriend. Lup frowned and looked around her bedroom. The closet was nearly empty, aside from a few pairs of Barry’s jeans, but the rest of the room was in a disaster state. Their vibrant red comforter was barely visible under a patchwork of shimmering fabrics and leather. She had a few suitcases on the floor, but only a few items had made it into them yet. The dresser was a treasure trove of flashy gold jewelry, much of which was stolen from Taako. Her favorite black boots were on a chair- they were so tall that they had to be draped over the back of the chair.

“Hmm,” she said, “You’re right, Babe, I should bring my Converse just in case.” 

“No- well, yes, you know what those boots do to your feet- but what about our instruments? Or food?” Lup grabbed her knee-high converse, and few other pairs in various colors- including the blue pair Barry’d bought for her the last time she’d only brought her boots on tour.

“Maggie and Taako are in charge of all that, we just have to bring our fabulous selves, and do what we do.” She dropped her shoes into one of the bags.

“What about a toothbrush?”

Lup rolled her eyes, “Nerd!” but she grabbed a pen from an end table and scribbled “nerd stuff” at the bottom of her list, then held it out for Barry to see, “better?”  
It was Barry’s turn to roll his eyes, but he was smiling. “Better.” He kissed her forehead then cleared enough space on the bed to sit down- his bags were already packed and ready by the front door. “So how can I help?”

“I need to pick out outfits.” she grabbed a pair of high-waisted red shorts and a metallic pink corset, “What do you think of this for Boston?”

“Uh,” Barry floundered, “Maybe save it for Dallas? Because it’ll be hot there.”

“Dallas doesn’t deserve this outfit, babe!”

“Oh, tell me it’s not come to this,” Taako said from the doorway. “Tell me my dearest twin sister has not become so desperate as to ask fashion advice from a man with the last name ‘Bluejeans.’” He was leaning on the doorframe, grinning. “Where did I go wrong?” Lup turned to him.

“If only my darling twin brother had shown up an hour ago to help me pack like he promised. Maybe then things would have been different.”

“It couldn’t be helped.” Taako flipped his braid over his shoulder. “It takes time to look this good.”

Lup took a very long look at his outfit. “I forgive you, but only because those heels should be illegal.”

Taako grinned wider, and stepped into the room. “Alright, Barrold, move over. Can’t have my twin sister walking onstage in denim. People might think it’s me, and we can’t have people thinking I wear denim”

Lup smiled sympathetically, “Sorry, Babe.” But Barry looked relieved. He slid off the bed and sat on the floor between Lup’s bags.  
“That’s probably more of an LA ensemble, Lulu,” Taako said, gesturing to the outfit in her hands.

“You’re so right.” She handed the shorts and corset to Barry, who folded and packed them for her.  
Between the three of them it only took Lup about two and a half hours to get her clothes packed- which Magnus declared a new record when they mentioned it later. The three of them carried the bags out to the living room where Lucretia, Kravitz and Magnus were sitting on the couch, chatting. Upon seeing them Magnus thrust both hands in the air.

“Road Trip!” He exclaimed.

Lup pumped her fist and cheered in response. “Hell yeah!”

“We all set to leave?” Barry asked dropping one of Lup’s bags by the door.

“Pretty much,” Magnus said. “Cap’nport is just giving the bus a third final check.”

“Natch,” Taako said, dropping Lup’s backpack on the floor and crossing the room to throw himself down on Kravitz’s lap. “Settle in, fellas, we’ve got two more final checks to get   
through.” Barry picked up the bag Taako dropped and set it next to the door with the other one. Lup followed suit.

“Lame!” She said, “I’m ready to party.” She flopped into an armchair and crossed her legs over the arm.

“Where’s Merle?” Barry asked.

“Hindering the process, I’m sure.” Taako said. Magnus reached over Kravitz for a high five, and Taako obliged.

“Yeah, that’s pretty much it.” Magnus said.

Lucretia cleared her throat. “So, what is everyone most looking forward to?”

“Blowing this town,” Lup said.

“Honey, we’re coming back,” Barry said. “We live here.” Lup shrugged in answer.

“What about you, babe?” She said. She kicked out her leg to bump his with her toe.

“Me? I’m just looking forward to being on stage with you guys.” He smiled at her, then at Kravitz, who smiled back and nodded.

Taako booed.

“Rude,” Kravitz said, and tugged Taako’s braid gently.

“I can’t wait to see Team Sweet Flipz again,” Magnus says. “Carey and I text all the time, and she’s super cool.”

“Remember last year when she set off a smoke bomb and stole the hat off every guy in the audience before the smoke cleared?” Barry said.

“Yes, that was the shit.” Lucretia said, “although I’m sure returning them was a nightmare.” A silence fell over the group as knowing looks were exchanged. “Wait, she did return-?”

“Well,” Taako interrupted, “I am looking forward to finding the fanciest restaurant in every town and deciding my food is better.”

“I’m looking forward to eating your food,” Kravitz said.

“You already do that everyday.”

Kravitz shrugged. Merle and Davenport came in then.

“What’re we talking about?” Merle asked.

“What we’re looking forward to,” Barry answered.

“Oh, I’m excited to see The Hunger at that big music festival.” All heads turned to Merle. “What?”

“That’s it, you’re fired.” Lup said.

“What? They’re pretty good. And that John guy is pretty nice.”

“Didn’t he try to stab you?” Lucretia said,

“Well, he missed.”

“That’s it, Lup out.” Lup pushed up out of the chair and grabbed one of her bags from by the door. Magnus followed and grabbed both of the other bags in one hand, “Thanks, big guy.”

The group filed out of Lup and Barry’s second story apartment, down the stairs and out into the parking lot where the Starblaster was waiting. Their tour bus was a bit garish, white and black with the word “Starblaster” painted in the flaming orange tail of a shooting star. Lup would never say it out loud, but she loved the old hunk of junk. She bounded toward the open bus door, kissed her hand and slapped the side of the Starblaster in one smooth motion, then leapt up the few stairs into the bus.

The inside was fairly spacious, considering it was a bus. There was a bench seat along one side, and the otherside was split evenly between a booth seat and the kitchenette- which was a generous word for the counter, toaster oven, and mini fridge. At the back were two doors, one for the bathroom that absolutely no one was permitted to use after The Incident, and the other for the bedroom that held a bed that stretched nearly the full space between the walls of the bus, and a twin bunk poised above it, the ladder to which took up the remaining space between the matress and the wall. The whole interior was lined with exactly the kind of gross 70’s carpeting you’d expect. She and Taako had already vowed to upgrade this bus just as soon as The Reapers hit the big time.

The rest of the crew was filing onto the bus behind her, so Lup threw herself down into the booth seat and dropped her bag on the floor- the table was already mostly devoted to Barry’s keyboard, which prompted Barry to slide in across from her. Kravitz sat on the bench seat across from them and tucked his bass case behind his legs. Taako put his head on Kravitz’s thigh, kicked out his legs so they took up most of the bench, and threw an arm over his eyes. Merle sat by his feet. Lucretia sat down next to Lup in the booth. Davenport entered after her and settled into the driver's seat. Magnus was the last to rush onto the bus. He took one look at the seating arrangements, stepped up to the bench seat, lifted Taako’s feet, sat, and replaced them on his lap. Taako made a disapproving noise, but didn’t move otherwise.

“Everyone on?” Davenport asked. A chorus of cheers answered him. The cheers grew louder as he started the bus and pulled out of the parking lot. They were an hour out when Lup sat up suddenly.

“Shit, I forgot-”

“Don’t worry, Babe,” Barry said, taking Lup’s hand over the table, “I grabbed your toothbrush.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song used is “When You Sleep” by Mary Lambert and is actually pretty gay.

When You Sleep:  
One foot in front of the other  
Keep breathing just like, they taught you  
You politely asked to take a walk with me  
I would’ve married you there underneath the trees  
Is it real, this thing?  
Is it real, ooh, this thing?

The sun was just starting to break over the horizon when Barry sat down in the booth with his pop tart. Once they arrived at their first destination they’d check into a hotel suite, with a kitchen, and Taako would make their meals, but they wouldn’t arrive in Illinois until late tonight. They’d probably pull through a McDonald’s at some point, but everyone else was still sleeping, aside from Davenport, who was driving and chugging an energy drink that Barry’d grabbed for him from the fridge.

“You sure you don’t want me to drive for a bit so you can take a nap?” Barry asked.

“Nah, I’m alright, Barry, thanks. Magnus will give me a break once he wakes up.”

Barry shrugged and took a bite of his pop-tart before turning to his keyboard and lowering the volume so as not to wake his friends. Most of them went to sleep in the bedroom, but Lup and Barry had fallen asleep together on the bench seat. She was still sleeping on the bench under the blanket Barry’d grabbed for her when he woke up. Lup slept like the dead, mouth agape and snoring softly. Strands of her hair were falling out of the braid she’d put it in yesterday, and the braid had fallen over her face.

These were the moments that left Barry feeling most inspired. For Lup it was the moments right after a show, when she was high on adrenaline and cheers, and for Kravitz, it was at night, just after dark and just before bed, but Barry loved quiet mornings, when he could see both the sunrise and his girlfriend. He started playing, almost idly, not really with any attention to the actual chords, he just wanted to get lost in it. And he did. He played a soft happy melody, with the potholes in the road playing accompaniment, the sun through the trees as a spotlight, and Davenport as the only audience. He hit a certain chord that he quite liked, and tried it again, then wrote a few notes in his notebook and started to play again. He started humming a melody, stopping periodically to write things down. He was so focused that it startled him to hear Lup across the table. 

“Wait, do that bit again, but a C on that last beat.” He looked up, and she was sitting forward chewing on her eraser. He played the chord again and she nodded, writing a few things down. He started playing from the beginning, and gave her a count off, to know where he thought the lyrics should start. While he counted, she slid around to his side of the booth and propped up her notepad so they could both see it. Lup’s handwriting was a special brand of chicken scratch, but Barry had enough practice that it was legible. 

Lup started to sing improvised notes, some of them imitating the melodies he’d been humming earlier, “I could make you happy, I could make you love me, I could disappear, completely-”  
Barry jumped in and they sang together, “I could be your love song, I could be long gone I could be a ghost, in your eardrum. When you sleep, will it be with me?”

Barry quieted and let Lup sing the next line alone, “When you sleep, will it be with me?”

He played a few more notes, and started into the second verse while Lup was writing something down. “I swore I saw you in a dream, All dressed in white and wide smile. You politely asked to take a walk with me,” he hummed out the rest of the line while Lup scribbled furiously. 

“That’s good, Bear.” She looked up, “Real good. It’s not our usual sound but it’s killer.”  
Barry smiled, his cheeks turning red, and fixed his eyes on the black and white keys. “Oh, that? It’s nothing, I’m not even really awake yet, I just- I mean- thanks.”

Lup laughed and kissed his cheek. “Well, as fun as this has been, I think it’s getting a little quiet around here, what do you think?”

“What did you have in mind?”

He watched her pick up her phone from the table in lieu of an answer. She opened a playlist titled “Lit” and turned up her volume in preparation.  
Barry laughed, gesturing to the back of the bus. “After you.”

They crept to the bedroom together and were greeted by Magnus’ snores. The corresponding individual was sprawled out across the lower bed, diagonally, face down, in boxers and a worn t-shirt. In the lower corner of the bed, with his head on Magnus’ back, Merle was passed out in his ratty, grease-stained sweats that they’d all begged him to throw out a thousand times. Barry was unsurprised to find that Lucretia was awake already, sitting in the upper corner of the bed, propped up against most of the pillows, reading a thick, blue novel. Her knees were pulled up to her chest, allowing her fuzzy socks to peek out from under the hem of her cornflower blue flannel pajamas.

She looked up when they entered, but Lup held a finger to her lips and winked. Lucretia smiled and returned to her book.

The only sign of Taako and Kravitz up on the top bunk was an arm- presumably Taako’s- hanging over the edge.

Lup showed Barry the song she had queued then climbed half way up the ladder to the top bunk. Barry stationed himself in the corner opposite her, and waited for her to count down with her fingers before hitting play.

“DON’T WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT!” They sang in unison.

Magnus shot up, causing Merle to roll off the bed and land at Barry’s feet. He saw Kravitz’s head pop up over the rail, and then disappear again.

“God, you are the absolute worst!” Taako said, but his words were swallowed up by the pillow he’d pulled over his head and the sheer volume at which Lup and Barry were singing.

Lucretia started singing along and Lup jumped down from the ladder to pull her friend off the bed and start dancing. Lucretia only resisted long enough to dog-ear her page and put her book down. The two of them started jumping in circles and laughing. Magnus joined them after a moment.

The song ended and Barry crouched down to check on Merle. “Guys,” he pointed at the older man, “He’s still asleep.”

Less than twenty minutes later Davenport pulled the Starblaster into a McDonald’s parking lot to the chanting of six grown adults, “McDonald’s! McDonald’s! McDonald’s!” He parked the bus, told Kravitz that he wanted two sausage McMuffins, and disappeared into the bedroom.

Kravitz followed Lup and Taako as they darted off the bus, only to run into them at the bottom of the steps, where they had stopped in their tracks. Barry bumped into him from behind.

“Everything alright?” Kravitz said.

Lup turned on her heel. “Back on the bus, go, go, go.”

“What’s wrong?” Barry asked.

“The Hunger is already here.” She answered, trying to shove back onto the bus.

“So we’ll just run in and out, it’ll be fine.” Magnus said from somewhere behind them. “C’mon, I’m hungry.” Kravitz’s stomach growled in agreement. Kravitz and Lup exchanged skeptical glances.

“C’mon, surely we an be civil for-” Lucretia started, “you know what, on second thought, I’m with Lup.

“Nope, food, now.” Magnus said. Barry knocked into Kravitz again as Magnus started pushing and coraling them off of the bus.

“Fine, but when shit hits the fan, I am not holding back, and you are personally responsible for that.” Lup said, stepping back so as not to be caught in their current. Kravitz Barry and Lup all fell to the back of the group.

“I’m not even dressed,” Lup grumbled. “Boys, how’s my hair?”

“You look great, babe.” Barry said with a smile.

“Here,” Kravitz grabbed her arm to stop her walking and turn her towards him. He leaned back to see her better, then ran his fingers through her hair, fluffing it and making it look more intentionally disheveled, to correspond with her yoga pants and one of their band T-shirts. He patted his pockets, producing a pink lipstick and handed it to her- Taako loved skirts, and skirts, apparently, don’t love pockets, so Kravitz usually had at least three different lip colors and a tube of mascara on him. These were his pajamas, though, so they should count themselves lucky that he had anything at all, not to mention such a subtle color.

“You are a godsend,” Lup said. While she used her front facing camera to apply the lipstick, Kravitz took off his button up pajama top, so he was just in his black pants and a basic white t-shirt. It was far from ideal, but at least it looked less like pajamas. Lup hung it over her purse. Kravitz turned to Barry, who was the only one of them who’d bothered to change out of his pajamas- or maybe he’d fallen asleep in those jeans. 

Kravitz zipped Barry’s hoodie, changed his mind and unzipped it, then zipped it again, before shrugging and turning away. “You’re fine.”

And with that Lup looped her arms through theirs and they started towards the building. “We never even noticed they were here.” She said  
Kravitz nodded and started talking over-animatedly as they walked through the door. “And then he came home with flowers, do you believe it? He’s honestly so charming, I don’t know how I got so lucky.”

“That’s absolutely adorable, Krav, I love it when Barry bring home flowers, every single day-”

“Lup, you hate flowers-” Lup elbowed Barry in the ribs, “-oh, right, uh, those flowers.” Kravitz had spotted a small crowd of black T-shirts in the back, and he was sure Lup and Barry had, too. They continued their chatter as they stepped up behind Magnus, who was ordering for himself.

“-And then two twenty pieces, three apple pies-”

Taako and Lucretia were by the pop machine, watching in disgust as Merle went back and forth, dispensing all of the sodas into his cup until it was full. The Reapers kept up their performance until they ordered- a blueberry muffin for Kravitz, Three hashbrowns and a Frappe for Lup, and a McMuffin for Barry. They joined Taako in dragging Merle’s sweatpants while they waited for their food.

“They’re falling apart, Merle,” Kravitz said.

“They are not!” Merle protested, “They’re just worn in.”

“I can see half of your ass, and all of your Kenny Chesney tattoo.” Taako said, crossing his arms.

“Your welcome,” Merle said.

“Well, look who it is,” a new voice chimed in. Kravitz turned around to face a pale man, with dark hair, and too much eyeliner. He wore all black, aside from a bomber jacket with silver and rainbow sequins.

“Oh John,” Kravitz said, putting a hand on his chest in mock surprise. “I didn’t recognize your voice without all the filters, how are you?”  
John gave a small laugh, and nodded, “It’s good to see you all, too. I didn’t think we’d have the pleasure of speaking until Phandolin-”

“You’re playing in Phandolin, too?” Barry asked.

“Oh, you didn’t hear? Team Sweet Flipz landed a different gig that night, a few towns over. They asked me to take their spot as your opening act, since my tour is passing through the area. There was room in the schedule, so I graciously accepted.”

Kravitz and the others turned to Lucretia, who was frowning intensely at her orange soda. “They never mentioned this to me.”

“Oh they didn’t? How terribly unprofessional of them.” He looked over his shoulder, quickly, then back at their group. Kravitz tried to follow his gaze, but couldn’t find what he’d been looking at. “Well, this has been great, but I’ll have to get going. See you in Phandolin.” He turned, and swung his bag out in a wide arc, causing it to collide with Lup’s frappe and send the frozen drink hurtling into Lucretia, who was standing beside her. The moment the drink left her hand, Lup sprung forward, but Barry was just as fast, and was able to throw his arms around his girlfriend’s waist before she could tackle John to the ground.

“Asshole,” she swore.

“Wow, Lup, such conduct. It was only an accident. Apologies, Lucretia, I hope I didn’t ruin your-” he evaluated her stained pajamas. “Hm.” He turned back to Barry, who was still holding Lup, “You’d better-”

“If you don’t leave right now, I will let go.” Barry warned. Kravitz saw genuine fear flicker in John’s eyes, but the man just shrugged.

“I was leaving anyway.” He popped the collar of his sequinned jacket, turned, and left.

—-

“Shit, Magnus, I’m sorry, we were gonna tell you, we just hadn’t decided yet.” The group was back on the tour bus, breakfast in tow, but uneaten. Magnus had called Carey immediately, and she spoke to them all on speaker from the dashboard while Magnus drove “We got an offer to perform at The Bureau, and it’s just half an hour out of the way, and it would be great exposure, but we didn’t want to bail on you guys. We still haven’t made up our minds, but our manager went ahead and made the arrangements anyway. But you shouldn’t have found out this way. We won’t go, we’ll perform in Phandolin with The Reapers’ like we planned-”

“No, Carey, you should do it,” Magnus interrupted.

“No, Magnus, really, we made a commitment-”

“Magnus is right, Carey,” Lup said. “The Bureau? That’s huge, you can’t pass this up!”

“She’s right, we can deal with John for one night.” Kravitz said.

“Let’s hope your fans can, too.” Taako said. Kravitz pinched his thigh. “Ow! Hey!”

“Are you guys sure?”

“Absolutely!” The Reapers chorused,

“You heard ‘em, Lizard Girl, you guys are gonna rock The Bureau.” Magnus said.

“Thanks, Spaceman, we’ll see you in Illinois, yeah?”

“Hell yeah!” The conversation was interrupted by a loud clunking sound.he Starblaster started shaking. “Carey, I’m gonna call you back.”


	3. Chapter 3

Your UBER driver has arrived!

The plan had originally been for all eight of them to wait with the Starblaster until it could be towed to a shop and fitted with new tires- Davenport was livid that Magnus had somehow managed to burst all of the Starblaster’s tires in the short time that he’d been asleep- but then the tow truck got held up, and it looked like it was going to take a few hours, so Taako called an Uber. While they waited, it was decided that Merle, Davenport, and Magnus would stay with the Starblaster, while the rest of them went on ahead to the hotel.

“Now Magnus, this is for the cost of repairs, only,” Lucretia said, offering him the credit card she used for band-related expenses. “No frivolous purchases.”

“When have I ever made a frivolous purchase on the band card?” He answered, putting the plastic in his wallet.

“Need I remind you of the Cheese Fries challenge?”

“Hey, I finished that challenge!”

“An hour after the time limit.”

“What about that sleeveless flannel?” Taako called, already in the Uber van.

“That was a good investment!” Magnus insisted,

“It was a travesty,” Lup said, climbing in after her brother.

“There was the time you bought a blu-ray copy of the Batman anime,” Merle said.

“Batman: The Animated Series, and it was on sale!”

“Maybe you should give the card to Davenport,” Lucretia said, fidgeting with the strap of her bag.

“Nah, it’s fine, I can handle it.” Magnus said, turning away. Lucretia opened her mouth to press the issue, but Kravitz called out that they’d finished loading their bags into the Uber, so she just let out a sigh and bounded over to the van.

“I’m now officially taking bets on what he buys,” Taako announced, as Lucretia squeezed passed him to sit with Barry and Lup in the back row.

“I’m in,” Kravitz said, taking the last seat next to Taako and sliding the door closed behind him. “10 bucks says it’s a toy of some sort.”

“I’m betting an egregious amount of candy,” Lucretia said. Lup snorted. Their driver hopped into the car then.

“Hey, guys, I’m Avi, I’ll be your Uber driver today, where are we headed?” Lucretia gave him the address of their hotel. He punched it into his GPS and then took off down the road like they’d been shot out of a cannon. “So what brings you folks out this way?”

Lucretia caught the look Taako shot Lup, and her responding eye roll. Great, he’s a talker.

 

It took them most of the day to reach their hotel.

“You guys have a great night, good luck at your show tomorrow, it was great to meet you, I’ll definitely be downloading your album-” Avi continued on as he pulled their bags out of the back.

“Bye, Avi!” Taako said, taking the last bag and turning away. Lucretia offered a parting wave, and led the way inside. They checked in and headed up to their suite- They actually had three rooms: one for Lup and Barry, one for Taako and Kravitz, and a suite, with two bedrooms, a common space, and a kitchenette. Lucretia and Magnus usually shared one room in the suite while Merle and Davenport shared the other. During their down time, though, they usually hung out together in the common area, which is where they’d just settled when Lucretia made the suggestion of pizza for dinner, since they didn’t have a car for Taako to make a grocery run. Nearly an hour later, she was beginning to regret the decision.

“Pizza is meant to be a savory dish, you can’t just put a fruit on it!” Taako said.

“Sweet and savory is a beloved flavor combo, Koko, you’re a chef, you know that,” Lup answered.

“And I also know garbage food.”

“What if we got half with pineapple and half without,” Barry said. Lucretia tried not to laugh at the look the twins gave him. You’d think he’d learn. Kravitz, next to Lucretia on the couch, pulled up a pizza delivery app on his phone, and the two of them began quietly placing an order for five pizzas- two meat lovers for Magnus, a veggie for Merle and Kravitz, plain cheese for Taako, a Hawaiian for Barry and Lup, and three orders of bread- Lucretia didn’t discriminate between pizzas, so long as she could eat absurd amounts of breadsticks, and she knew Davenport would eat a little of everything. 

They’d just submitted the order, without ever drawing attention, when Magnus swung the door open, and started waving a box around. “I found a limited edition Transformers PEZ set!”

Lucretia and Kravitz looked at each other and shrugged. “Guess we’ll call it a draw.” She said, then turned back to Magnus. “So what happened with the Starblaster?”

“Well,” Davenport said, coming in behind Magnus with Merle, “it’s all fixed up, it was just the tires, you know, but-”

“The mechanic said it looked intentional,” Merle said.

“I told you it wasn’t me,” Magnus said. He was already leaning against the kitchen counter eating candy out of a Decepticon. Davenport shrugged.

“But who would slash our tires?” Barry asked,

“I’ll give you three guesses,” Lup said.

“Kravitz?” Merle said

“Yep, you got me,” Kravitz deadpanned.

“You think it was John?” Lucretia asked. Sure, John loved to razz them, but would he really do something so malicious? Well-

“He did try to stab Merle, how different is slashing tires?” Lup said.

"Tires don’t scar,” Merle said, rubbing his right arm where he still had a scar from his excursion.

“Didn’t you say he missed?” Kravitz said,

“Well he was aiming for the ribs.”

“Can we prove it?” Lucretia said,

“Well probably not, it happened a while ago, but you know where someone’s aiming when they try to stab you-”

“Not that, Merle.”

“Probably not,” Davenport said, “I tried to call that McDonalds back, but they wouldn’t give me a straight answer, and the corporate office needs a request from the specific McDonalds to get the right footage. It was a whole thing.”

“I knew we should’ve left,” Lup said. “It wasn’t even a good McDonald’s, they wouldn’t replace my Frappe, even though that manager totally saw what happened. She made me pay full price!”

“Aren’t we supposed to perform with him in a few days?” Barry said, over Lup’s continued rant, “What if he tries something, what do we do?”

“Dav, did you have the mechanics check everything and make sure he didn’t tamper with anything else?” Kravitz started. The three Reapers were all talking over each, and Magnus and Merle and Taako started in with them soon enough. Davenport looked dead on his feet- he’d barely slept since they left, and it was clearly starting to take its toll. Lucretia got to her feet.

“That’s enough,” she said, not yelling, but speaking with a forcefulness that cut through the calamity. The voices fell. “Davenport, please sit down before you fall over. The pizza will be here soon, and then you can go to bed.” Davenport nodded and took a seat on the couch by Kravitz. “As for the rest of you, this is not how we’re going to start this tour, it’s too important. I will come up with a plan to keep John away from the Starblaster, you have my word, but tonight, we will eat pizza and make a drinking game out of terrible movies are on TV, and then we will all go to sleep, and wake tomorrow well rested and ready to blow Chicago’s mind. Do I make myself clear?”

There was a moment of silence before Lup’s face broke into a smile, and she bounced over to throw an arm around Lucretia’s waist, “Hell yeah, babe, that’s the spirit. This is gonna be our best tour yet!”

“Hear, hear!” Magnus called, raising his Starscream PEZ in toast. A cheer rose up just as they got a call from the front desk to announce their pizza. By the time Lucretia retrieved it and returned, the negative energy in the room had lifted, and everyone was in high spirits. Magnus, Lup, and Merle had pooled their alcohol reserves and were collaborating to make drinks. Davenport was nearly asleep on the couch, but he perked up at the sight of food.

Lucretia snatched one of the bags of breadsticks away from the food before everyone bombarded the table, and waited until everyone was settled with their food before grabbing a veggie slice for herself. Davenport dismissed himself shortly thereafter, and almost immediately following that Merle started handing out mixed drinks and Lup started passing around a bottle of tequila. With bellies full of pizza, no one got totally wasted, but they drank enough that everyone went to bed giggling. Lucretia set her alarm and snuggled close to Magnus- the man radiated heat, and her flannel pjs were still just damp enough to be uncomfortable.

“Hey, Lucretia?”

“Yes, Magnus?”

“Do you know what we’re gonna do about John?” 

Lucretia bit her lip. “Not yet.”

“Could I just punch him?”

“Maybe. Good night, Magnus.”

“Good night, Lucretia.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, I just got hella writers block, but due to the help of a friend, I'm better for now. This chapter might be a little slow, but things should be picking up soon.


End file.
